Lucy and Rory got hitched on 30 July 2016. We’re ever so slightly in love with them…
Welcome to Lucy and Rory’s wedding day. Oozing with love, London vibes and individuality. If any of you are questioning those archaic wedding traditions and wondering how, or if, you can change them and have your own kinda wedding, then read on. I promise you’ll feel inspired…and slightly gooey inside.
Bridelings, meet Lucy. I met Lucy (a friend of a close friend of mine) about 9 years ago. I’ve had a pretty big girl crush on her ever since. There are friends of friends whose wedding snaps you look at for hours on Facebook, then don’t think of again for 10 years. Then there are friends of friends whose wedding snaps are so dang cool that you contact them, quiz them about their wedding, and ask if you can feature them on your blog.
Lucy and Rory, thanks so much for sharing your day with some fellow alternative wedding thinkers. We think you are just swell.
Vital wedding deets:
Southwark Registry Office, Camberwell followed by Bussey Rooftop Bar and The Nines, Peckham – (keep scrolling for links).
30 July 2016
Julian Smith Designs, with fabric from Goldhawk Road – (keep scrolling for links).
The Interview: When Down-to-earth Brides met Lucy
How did you meet your hubbie, and what is your story of getting engaged?
Rory and I met on Tinder! As he delighted in telling everyone at our wedding, I actually ghosted him for a bit when we were first messaging and then after our first date I told him I didn’t think there was a ‘romantic spark’! Needless to say, I am an idiot and fortunately came to my senses.
We got engaged quite unexpectedly! We’d been together 4 months, and we went out with some of Rory’s friends and ended up talking about weddings all night as one of his best mates was getting married that summer, which led to a drunken conversation when we got home about marriage and whether we wanted to get married….which led to a sober conversation the next morning about whether we had in fact got engaged the night before!
We decided we had and the rest is history…although we waited 6 months to tell everyone (I was convinced they wouldn’t take us seriously if we didn’t have a ring and then everything took a bit longer than planned.) And everyone was still gobsmacked even then, ha.
Did you always think you’d get married?
Nope! I never wanted to get married when I was younger! I really didn’t see the point – I was really obsessed with the fact it seemed like an institution that hadn’t really changed that much since women were ‘sold’ with a dowry. This sounds really cheesy, but it was only after I met Rory that I understood that it could be a really beautiful symbol of your commitment and love for someone, and he has always understood and agreed with how important it was for me to do it in a way that I didn’t feel challenged by its traditions and history.
Where and when did you get married?
We got married on 30 July 2016 at Southwark Registry Office in Camberwell, a really beautiful Georgian townhouse with a lovely garden at the back. The reception was at two venues in Peckham – Bussey Rooftop Bar for the afternoon and The Nines for evening dancing. This wasn’t the original plan – we had another venue in East London which fell through at four months notice (they turned out to be fairly terrible people).
But honestly, we ended up having the wedding that was 100% perfect for us and didn’t in the slightest feel like a second choice. In fact it felt so perfect that I couldn’t believe we hadn’t planned it in the first place! We live just down the road and spend loads of time in both Peckham and Camberwell so it actually made it even more meaningful.
Can you describe your wedding day in just three words?
Fun, colourful, joyful.
It’s funny actually – a really good piece of advice someone gave me while we were planning the wedding was to pick three words you want to describe your wedding, and then when you have to make any decisions related to it, ask yourselves whether they contribute to those three things. Ours were ‘stylish, affordable’, fun’.
How do you feel when you think about your wedding day?
We’ve both just got such lovely memories of the day and what’s really made it for us is that everyone who was there seems to feel the same way. I feel very warm and fuzzy and soppy when I think about the day.
Would you recommend getting married?
I would say it’s entirely up to the individual/couple whether they want to get married. I have friends who’ve been in long-term relationships for years and have no intention of getting married, and there is no good reason I can think of that they should.
It felt right for us but that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. Selfishly, though, I really want EVERYONE to get married because I love going to weddings!
What is your view towards wedding traditions…?
I’m not a remotely traditional person and neither is Rory. I didn’t want a traditional wedding at all; a lot of the reasons I hadn’t wanted to get married when I was younger were about how tradition is imposed on people, particularly women, who get married.
So I knew from the start that I didn’t want to wear a white dress, that I didn’t want my Dad to ‘give me away’, that I was definitely going to make a speech, that I wasn’t going to change my name, even that I didn’t want to spend loads of money on a wedding cake!
We actually had a lot of fun working out how to do things in the way that we wanted, and ended up learning about wedding traditions elsewhere. Apparently in Scandinavia it’s commonplace for the couple to walk down the aisle together, which is what we ended up doing. And Rory has actually taken my name, which means the world to me.
Having said that, I fully respect everyone’s right to do whatever they want on their wedding day and keep it as traditional, or not, as they want. The one thing I would say is that I think it’s always important to question tradition. Specifically I think people should think about the symbolism of a white dress, of being walked down the aisle by their father, of only men making speeches, of it being the norm for women to change their names. And if the way you want to do your wedding happens to be the traditional way then that’s totally fine!
Which things about your wedding were most enjoyable to organise? And the least??
I’m going to be 100% honest here and say that I really, really didn’t enjoy organising the wedding on the whole. I think that, because I never saw myself getting married, I didn’t have a clue how I wanted my wedding to be and I just felt really overwhelmed.
So it took us ages to decide even on the general location – we spent months circling round options in the North East, Manchester, Berlin and Margate before we decided to keep it in London. Then everywhere was either really expensive or was going to require doing everything ourselves which seemed like so much extra work.
The whole thing wouldn’t have happened at all without Rory’s unfailing imagination, perseverance, and most importantly patience with me, the most difficult bride of all time!
But I will say without a single hesitation that all of the stress was worth it in the end. And everyone said that to me before the wedding and I didn’t believe them, so I think it’s a truth you have to discover yourself.
Where and how did you find your wedding outfit?
I had my wedding outfit made by an independent designer called Julian Smith. I posted something on Facebook lamenting that I didn’t have a clue what too wear on the day and a friend from uni very kindly put me in touch with Julian, who, as well as designing clothes and working as a pattern cutter, also performs as a Drag Queen called Jacqui Potato!
After a lot of thought, I decided on a caped jumpsuit loosely inspired by one of Solange’s wedding outfits (she had five, haha) and he put together a design for me. The next problem was the colour and fabric. I went fabric shopping so many times and just couldn’t find anything I liked! I knew I didn’t want white. Aside from the tradition aspect, my skin tone just looks awful in any tone of white, cream or ivory. Eventually, my mum and I went to Goldhawk Road one Saturday and found this incredible printed silk in loads of different colours. It wasn’t at all what I thought I was looking for, but I fell in love with it, took it to Julian and he worked his magic. I absolutely love my jumpsuit, it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever owned and I totally felt like the best version of myself in it.’
Which of your suppliers would you recommend?
- Julian Smith made my outfit and I would definitely recommend him for anyone who wants a non-traditional wedding outfit! You can find drop him a massage through his Jacqui Potato Facebook page.
- Jenny Robins did the illustration for our invitations and she is brilliant.
- Fraser Hamilton made our rings (he also made my beautiful engagement ring so I’ve got a pair now).
- Lovely Maddy Scantlebury did my make-up on the day and she is a dream
- Sophie Stafford took our wedding snaps. We originally planned to not have a professional photographer and just have friends do it, but a group of our friends clubbed together and paid for a photographer as a wedding present. I can’t believe we ever considered not having one! Sophie was absolutely amazing (she took all of the photos in this post), the photos are so beautiful and she was a joy to have around on the day
- Forza Win did the food at our afternoon reception, were amazing and so lovely to deal with. The same goes for The Nines in Copeland Park, where we hired a room for the evening and who also provided a delicious late night buffet.
Jenny Robins, the Sketching Ninja
Would you recommend a honeymoon?
Yes, absolutely! I think it was nice to be in a bit of a dream-like state for a while and not have to deal with any normal life stuff. You don’t have to go halfway across the world for that at all, I think it’s just important to go somewhere that isn’t home and be the two of you. Just for a bit, especially after the run-up to the wedding, which is naturally super stressful even if everything is sorted in advance. Stepping off the plane in Vietnam after 11.5 hours and knowing we had 4 weeks of total freedom ahead of us was just amazing.
Any other words of wisdom…?
Do whatever you want and don’t feel like you have to explain your choices to anyone. It’s your day!
We love you, Lucy and Rory. Thanks for inspiring us to stick to our guns, to celebrate our unique ways and encouraging like-minded bridelings to challenge some traditions. Your wedding looks so beautiful, thanks for sharing it with us!
Peace out, bridelings.